O.K., Ok, Okay, K

I want the term "okay" in all of it's forms banished from the English language.

I seriously believe that one day my head is going to completely explode with the use of that word. When I end up having a stroke and they rush me to the hospital and they ask, "What happened?", more than likely it will be that I stroked over the response "okay" from one of my teenagers.

Now you are probably thinking - okay is a positive term. A means of agreement. If your teens are using it, it must be in compliance with something you've said or asked. Guess what? It's not! That is not the way "okay" comes out of their mouths.

Here are a few examples of what I am talking about:

Mom: "Your teacher posted that you didn't turn in your homework."
Teen: "Okay, Mom."
Problem: No! It's not "okay". What kind of answer is that? It is at this moment that my teen needs to explain what happened. Saying okay means nothing. Tell me why you didn't turn in your homework!

Mom: "The dog needs to go out right now."
Teen: Walking away from me says, "Okay."
Problem: No! It's not "okay". Take the dog out! If you are turning and walking away from me - explain why...don't just walk away. Tell me you are getting your shoes. Tell me you will after you go to the bathroom. Tell me something besides "okay" as you walk away. I guarantee an hour from now you won't be back and the dog will be sitting at the door with his legs crossed!

Mom: "You need to take your laundry upstairs please."
Teen" "K"
Problem: It's not "okay". Teen is sitting on the couch watching television. Teen will sit there until 5 minutes before they have to leave for school then in a mad rush to get things together will explain why they don't have time to take the laundry upstairs. "K" has been used as a means to trick Mom into thinking they are willing to do the chore. Teen has no intention of doing the chore. "Okay" means "I heard you" and that is about it.

Mom: While disciplining her teen says, "You are being very disrespectful."
Teen: Before Mom has even completed her sentence says, "Okay."
Mom: Shouting, "It is NOT OKAY!"
Teen: "Okay."
Mom: "When I am talking to you don't talk over me. And stop saying "OKAY"!
Teen: Teen looks at Mom completely confused like she is having a moment of insanity and says, "Oooookkkkkay????"
Problem: Mom has to remind herself that if she kills her teen she will go to jail for a long time.

So teens use the term "okay" as a way of acknowledging that they are listening to you but don't really care about what you are saying. Saying "okay" is actually saying, "whatever", "shut-up", "you are on my nerves.", "just leave me alone", "go away", or "I'm not really listening to you." The list goes on.

Let's examine the tone that "okay" is usually voiced. Is it upbeat? No. In agreement? Of course not. That positively cute little word is cloaked in spite, annoyance, disrespect, intolerance, impatience or complete ambivalence. In fact, if that word could - it would roll it's eyes at you when it rolled off your teen's tongue. There are moments I am sure that that word has flipped me off as it has been said.

"Okay" is used by teens as a means to try to control your conversation with your teen as a parent. They are trying to diffuse any confrontation, correction, question, command, or request you are making of them. They just want you to go away. They don't want to hear what advice you may have. They are not interested in your insight. They certainly don't want to hear any words spoken about something unacceptable that they have done. So they say okay. It is a weasel word.

I want "okay" replaced with terms like "yes ma'am", "yes sir", "I'll take care of it", "right away", "you got it", "I'm on it", "no problem", "happy to help", or "sure"!

I did some research trying to find out the original intention of this term. Who came up with it? What did it actually derive from? Interestingly, though there are dozens of unproven theories, no one really knows. One idea is in the American Choctaw Indian language, there is a word okeh, which means "it is so". If you are interested in learning about the numerous theories, http://www.miketodd.net/encyc/okay.htm is a great link to get brief synopses of several thoughts.

Since, in truth, there doesn't seem to be a conclusive idea to explain the origin of this term for me, I think I am going to categorize "OKAY" as just another forbidden four letter word in my home. It may be the only way to ensure that we all survive teenagehood.